Breaking Through Power Struggles: Insights for Parents and Therapists
Struggling with constant battles and emotional walls with your teen? Discover how to turn power struggles into moments of connection and growth. Our blog and podcast offer practical strategies and heartfelt insights for parents navigating these tough times. Don’t wait—read the blog and listen now to find hope and real solutions for your family.
“Empathy is the ability to recognize someone’s struggle and search within yourself for a similar struggle. It’s about connecting emotionally, not intellectually.”
Want to Learn More? Read Our Blog on How a Culture of Service Drives Teen Healing and Success. ⤵️
Breaking Through Power Struggles: The Power of Connection in Teen Therapy
Do you ever feel like every conversation with your teenager becomes a battle? Striking the right balance between setting boundaries and staying connected with your teen can feel like a never-ending tug-of-war.
Therapists face similar challenges in their work, where moments of resistance can feel like walls rather than windows of opportunity. But what if we saw these power struggles as bridges, not barriers, to building and strengthening relationships?
At Turning Winds, power struggles aren’t seen as something to avoid—they’re viewed as pivotal moments for growth and adolescent development. These challenging interactions, often fueled by heightened emotions, are opportunities to teach teens resilience, foster deeper connections, and model empathy. As Carl Baisden explains on the Turning Winds Podcast,
“The biggest motivator of change is connection. Those little touchpoints, those moments of extending ourselves to a kid—they’re pure magic.”
The Connection Formula: Empathy + Curiosity in Parent-Teen Relationships
Empathy and curiosity are the magic formula for overcoming power struggles with teens. As Carl describes, empathy isn’t just about “being nice” or offering surface-level sympathy. Genuine empathy requires looking inward and drawing from our own difficult experiences to make an emotional connection with a teenager.
Imagine your teen slamming a door after an argument. The easy response might be frustration or punishment. But instead of reacting, what if you paused and asked, “What’s really going on here? What’s triggering this reaction?”
This simple act of curiosity—stepping into their shoes—can shift the narrative from conflict to connection and improve family relationships and communication.
“When a teen lashes out, they’re often saying, ‘I’m hurting,’” Carl shares. “Empathy means not taking their reaction personally. Instead of thinking, ‘How dare they?’ we can think, ‘It must be so hard to be in their shoes right now.’”
By pairing curiosity with empathy, you stop “butting heads” and start uncovering what’s driving the behavior. This approach not only de-escalates conflict but also opens space for meaningful dialogue that strengthens your relationship.
The “Magic” in Messy Moments: Effective Therapy for Teens
It’s easy to assume that progress happens during planned therapy sessions or family talks, but real breakthroughs often occur in life’s messy, unpolished moments. Helping with homework, sharing a laugh, or listening when a teen is upset—these seemingly small acts are powerful tools in effective therapy for teens, fostering connection and trust..
“These are the moments when teens light up,” Carl notes. “They find meaning and joy because someone extended themselves to connect.”
For parents, this means leaning into those messy moments instead of avoiding them. Did your teen explode in anger after being grounded? That’s your cue to engage—not to win an argument but to open a dialogue. It’s about getting right through empathy and patience; it’s about getting it right.
A Real-Life Example of Turning Winds’ Therapeutic Approach
Consider Mia, a 16-year-old who arrived at Turning Winds with a history of defiance and emotional outbursts. Her parents described her as “a ticking time bomb.”
During her first month, Mia frequently clashed with staff. One afternoon, she refused to participate in a group activity, shouting, “I hate it here! You can’t make me do anything!”
Instead of reacting with control, a staff member paused and said, “It looks like you’re having a really hard day. Do you want to talk about it?” Initially, Mia resisted, but this empathetic approach diffused her anger and showcased the power of relational therapy for teens. (The connection-building process showcases the power of relationships.)
Over time, these moments of patience and connection built trust. Three months later, Mia’s parents saw a transformation.
“She’s still a typical teenager,” her mom admits, “but she talks to us now. She lets us in. It’s like she learned how to handle her emotions instead of letting them handle her.”
Turning Conflict into Connection: Communication Strategies for Parents of Teenagers
Power struggles with a teenager are inevitable. But they don’t have to be roadblocks. The next time you find yourself battling your teen, approach them with empathy, curiosity, and patience. Over time, you’ll start to connect and deepen your relationship with even the most challenging child.
And remember, the most significant changes often follow the most difficult struggles. Parenting teens is no walk in the park, but with the right tools and mindset, those stormy moments can lead to the calm after the storm—and even clearer skies ahead.
Take the Next Step
Is your home a constant battleground? Have you tried everything to connect with your teen, but nothing seems to work? You’re not alone.
At Turning Winds, we help families navigate even the most challenging situations. We believe lasting change starts with connection, not control.
Listen to the Turning Winds Podcast: Gain valuable insights and strategies from experts in teen therapy.
Explore the Turning Winds Program: Discover how our unique approach to treatment fosters healing and growth.
Don't let cost be a barrier to your child's well-being. We accept most health plans for adolescent mental health treatment. Click below to verify your coverage and explore your options.
Building Meaningful Connections and Transforming the Lives of Our Struggling Teens.
Parenting Tips: Creating Change Through Engagement and Connection
At Turning Winds, connection lies at the heart of transformation. Host Kevin Zundl and guest Carl Baisden dive into the importance of building meaningful relationships with teens. Carl emphasizes how these personal touchpoints, often as simple as a shared laugh or a kind word, form the foundation of growth.
Carl shares, “If we took away those personal connections, I’m not sure what their outcomes would look like—and that scares me.” The Turning Winds approach prioritizes empathy and curiosity, fostering genuine moments where staff and teens connect, creating an environment of trust and understanding.
Empathy and Curiosity: Core Principles in Staff Training
Empathy is more than being kind—it’s about deeply understanding another’ persons’s challenges and struggle. At Turning Winds, staff undergo extensive “human training,” focusing on empathy and curiosity as essential tools for engagement with our students.
Carl explains, “Empathy is the ability to recognize someone’s struggle and search within yourself for a similar experience to connect emotionally, not intellectually.” This mindset helps staff avoid taking challenges personally and instead approach teens with patience and compassion, even during moments of defiance or power struggles.
Turning Power Struggles Into Growth Opportunities
Conflict is inevitable, but it can also be transformative. Carl highlights how moments of struggle—whether between staff and teens or staff themselves—become opportunities for growth and learning.
“When things aren’t smooth, we engage both staff and teens to reflect, reset, and refocus,” Carl explains. This culture of continual improvement ensures that every interaction, even a challenging one, is a step toward deeper connection and understanding.
A Relational Model: The Secret to Success
The relational model at Turning Winds stands out in its ability to foster meaningful change. Carl emphasizes that the program’s success is not only built on strong policies and procedures but on the human element.
“If you take away the compassion and empathy our staff have for the kids, the treatment is still good—but the outcomes aren’t the same because the connection isn’t there,” Carl notes. This focus on relationships helps teens feel seen, heard, and valued, setting the stage for lasting transformation.
Resources and Next Steps
The best time to seek help for your teen is yesterday—but the second best time is today. If you feel Turning Winds might be the right fit for your family, call 800-845-1380 or Contact Us.
For more insights, check out Season 1, Episode 7, where a mom and her son share their life-changing experiences at Turning Winds.
Take the first step towards a better future for your teen, contact us.
Podcast Transcript
Click the button below to view or download the episode transcript. (Please note: This is a raw text file and has not been edited.
Building a strong parent-teen relationship requires empathy and curiosity. By stepping into your teen’s shoes and addressing the underlying reasons for their behavior, you can transform power struggles into opportunities for connection and growth.
Breakthroughs Happen in Messy Moments
Progress with teens often occurs in unplanned, everyday moments, like helping with homework or sharing a joke. Leaning into these moments with patience and understanding can create meaningful breakthroughs.
Choose Connection Over Control
Power struggles are inevitable, but they don’t have to be barriers. Choosing connection over control fosters trust and emotional resilience, both in therapeutic settings and at home.
We believe that the process of learning can be therapeutic. The academic curriculum not only supports the ongoing educational journey but also prepares students with the ability to apply critical thinking skills to achieve their life ambitions.
Essential Terminology for Parents Searching for mental health treatment
Relational Therapy
A therapeutic approach that highlights the importance of meaningful, empathetic relationships is essential for healing and growth. In the context of adolescent development, relational therapy emphasizes building trust and connection between the therapist and the teen, particularly during instances of resistance or conflict.
By demonstrating empathy, curiosity, and emotional attunement, therapists and teachers at Turning Winds help teens understand their emotions, develop resilience, and improve their communication skills. This approach also encourages parents to adopt relational strategies, transforming power struggles into opportunities for deeper connection and mutual growth.
Power Struggle
A conflict between parents and teenager, compete to assert authority or control. In the context of adolescent development, power struggles can escalate tension and resistance but are also opportunities to build trust and connection when approached with empathy and curiosity.
By reframing these moments as bridges rather than barriers, parents and therapists can guide teens toward emotional growth and mutual understanding. Often a parent and a teen compete to assert authority or control, often leading to tension and resistance by the child.
Empathy in Therapy
Understanding and emotionally connecting with another person’s experiences and feelings is essential. At Turning Winds, empathy forms the foundation for building trust and effective communication with teens who are navigating heightened emotions.
Our professional team takes the time to see things from a teen’s perspective. Our therapists, teachers, and other staff are skilled at de-escalating conflicts, fostering emotional safety, and modeling the skills necessary for the teens in our care to develop greater resilience and self-awareness.
Frequently Asked Questions about Turning Winds
How can I handle power struggles with my teenager at home?
The best approach is to not engage, approach your child with empathy and curiousity. Do not react; instead try to undersantand and de-scalate the situation. Above all, leave room for on-going meaningful communication.
What makes relational therapy effective for teens?
Relational therapy focuses on creating strong, empathetic connections between therapists and teens. This relationship builds trust, which is essential for helping teens feel safe, process emotions, and develop healthy coping skills.
Are unplanned moments really important for therapy?
Yes! Breakthroughs often occur during unscripted, everyday interactions—like listening to a teen share their thoughts or offering support during a tough moment. These moments help build trust and deepen connections, which are key to long-term growth.
